Resume of a failed terrorist. What is wrong with it?
Professional resume writer shares her insight on Times Square bomber’s resume.
Faisal Shazad, a 30-year-old financial analyst failed as a terrorist. But it was not the only of his blunders. His resume (pdf) reveals most common mistakes people like Shazad make in their resumes. These mistakes can be avoided, experts say.
“This resume is not terrible. It’s just that it could be remarkably better,” said professional resume writer Wendy Enelow, an author, trainer and executive career consultant in Coleman Falls, Va. “It’s got enough stupid little mistakes that it communicates carelessness. No one hires careless financial analysts,” she said in an interview with Wall Street Journal.
Below are several tips on how Shazad’s resume could be improved:
1. Make structure more consistent. Pay attention to format and punctuation. Most of Faisal’s job descriptions are a list of bullets, but one has an introductory paragraph and a bullet list. Some listed items end in a period, others don’t. Some months are spelled out, others are abbreviated. Apostrophes are used randomly.
“If you give me a resume that has errors in it, it’s a reflection of the quality of work product that you’re going to perform, so you should be pretty darn sure that it’s close to perfect,” said Enelow.
2. Resume objective that is not clear. Objectives are antiquated and aren’t necessary, but if you include one, make it about the specific job you’re seeking. This objective says nothing:
“To work in a high-energy and challenging business environment that will promote professional and personal growth while adding significant value to my employer.”
“It’s a bunch of really nice words, but every one wants a challenging position and to add value,” said Enelow.
His “Career Highlights” section would suffice, but a better headline would be: “Senior Financial Operations Analyst.” This section should tell the reader quickly what makes you different or better than all the other analysts applying for that position. As Enelow put it: “What’s your wow factor?”
What’s more, it should mention his M.B.A., since it’s a highly marketable credential that is otherwise relegated to the end of the document. “It instantly knocks him up a couple of tiers,” Enelow said.
3. Laundry-list job descriptions. Position descriptions should convey the scope of responsibilities for each job as well as the accomplishments achieved in it. His position descriptions read as if taken straight from an employee handbook For example, here is the first bullet point:
“Prepare monthly commission forecasting for high-profile Affinion clients such as Citibank, Bank of America, Royal Bank of Scotland, People’s Bank, US Bank, Wells Fargo and a couple of smaller clients.”
“If this guy could part the Red Sea, little stuff like this is not going to matter,” said Enelow. “You’ve got to make yourself competitively distinctive.”
